Me..A Writer?

After publishing just 3 posts, I was stuck. I read my blog posts and started wondering did I even write this?  If I can write that, then why am I lost now? Was it not me who started all this? I even deactivated my Facebook and Instagram because I was somewhere ashamed of not pushing myself enough.
It all started when I published my last post When he saw her. It was a part of my old assignments from class, so that week and the following weeks I did not write at all.

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The paradox is, it takes us so much of courage and time to start something new but only a moment to lose your inspiration or like in my case the discipline.

I know I will confront this situation almost every second day. There will be weeks when I won’t write anything at all, Weeks when I will be absolutely lost, weeks when I will think I cannot do it anymore. On such days I will have to remind myself to HOLD ON, to trust myself and my abilities.
There are times when I only think of what I will publish next, to impress others, thus lose my true purpose of writing.
I write because I find it liberating. The only person I need to impress is ME. Writing is the only thing I love to do. What I write belongs to my imaginary world, the world in which I am important, and I can lose myself in it yet not be lost at all. I am not a good writer. I need to improve and I am trying, maybe I will never be a good writer but I will always be proud of me for doing something my heart told me to do, to take a year break from the daily hassles of life, to figure out myself. At least I know now that I want to study literature and not economics or any other subject. Maybe I will extend this break to two years before I commence with my post-graduation. But at the end, I know I would have become a better person not for others, but for me. All of us are selfish after all at least I am but this is a different kind of selfish.

Everybody needs to question themselves. Are you happy with what you are doing right now? If yes you are luckier than most of us. And if no, then it’s never too late to start all over again.

I know that there will be many restarts for me before I ACTUALLY find my path. Fortunately, Life gives me and most of us that option.

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“Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing” -Benjamin Franklin

 

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54 thoughts on “Me..A Writer?

  1. Bhanu says:

    You just have to strike a balance and I am sure you will get there.
    There will be times, when you will be carried away with all the online stuff !
    There will be times, when you will be totally offline !
    But in the end you should always do what you like and feel comfortable with.

    It is confusing and it is gets tougher with every higher step you move,
    but as long as you know who you are and what you want to do,
    then you will always keep your head above the water !

    Vamos Clueless Birdie !

    Liked by 2 people

  2. MindandLifeMatters says:

    The fact that you want to write and take efforts to do so in itself is an amazing achievement, so don’t worry about how many re-starts (as you call it) it takes. The important thing here is to realize and accept that you are indeed a Writer! That acceptance changes a lot of things! Trust me – I am talking from experience! 😀
    Good luck in your writing journey ahead!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Wandering Soul says:

    Pratice makes one perfect. No one was born being good. It takes practice and perseverance. So, keep at it. And enjoy it while you do. Remember, this is what you do for yourself and in the large scheme of things that should come first and foremost. 🙂
    Good luck. Keep writing!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. pamkirst2014 says:

    Certainly you are a writer! I think that writing for yourself is important, but writing to connect is one of life’s greatest joys, too. When you put something out there on your blog, and someone just completely GETS it–that’s the best. Keep writing and don’t be discouraged!

    All the best,

    Pam

    Liked by 1 person

  5. wordscoffeeandlacedresses says:

    Another person has already mentioned this but I will say it again. It does sound like you are still growing as a person and that’s perfectly fine. I believe that we all need to take a step back sometimes and reassess if we are happy with what is happening in our life and, if we are not, to change it.

    You can channel these thoughts into your writing. I too have been in a similar situation in the past few months where I haven’t been able to write anything as I haven’t had the inspiration to do so. The thing you need to here is change your train of thought. Find something completely different to your blog to inspire you. At the end of the day, this is your blog, you are the one writing it. Write for yourself and the audience will come to you

    Liked by 1 person

  6. freespirit says:

    Don’t worry i love writing and don’t often run out of things to write but i some times forget how to spell things and i am guilty of being a bit slap dash at times and not taking enough care about punchuation and grammer, just keep going its only a blog if your like me nobody is paying you so just write when you want to.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Clueless Birdie says:

      I am in the initial stage so I worry too much about having nothing to write about! yes , after posting this I realized i have done so many mistakes with the punctuation and grammar 😛 and thankyou 🙂

      Like

  7. Feelings and Freedom says:

    I guess we are in the same boat Niyati. But believe me ,though it takes a lot of courage and effort to pull yourself up to the writing task now but after sometime it will become a part of your being and you will have so much to write. At least, that is what I am hoping. And as many people said, it’s your blog and you should write for yourself. All the best. Keep writing 🙂

    Like

  8. xaranahara says:

    You’re a good writer, sweetie. Not everyone can come with material every day. I’m one of those people, too. When I was younger, it was easier because I didn’t feel like I was repeating myself. Now when I write, I sometimes feel repetitive. Who wants to read the same thing over and over again? That’s why I have to explore to find new ideas and options. You’re doing fine.

    Like

  9. Priceless Joy says:

    The more you write, the better at writing you will be. I write only for fun and not because I am good at it, because I know that I am not. But I enjoy writing for the various flash fiction challenges and believe that I get better the more I write (and the more I read). If you have taken a year off to pursue your writing because that is something you love to do then you have not wasted a year (or two, if you decide two). Being able to do something you love and make money at it too is a dream come true!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. s.emess says:

    True.
    I read in a lot of places that a blogger has to have reason for having a blog. That if they simply wanted to write, they could keep a journal. It does make sense. Blogs are a mode of expression, and they are written for others to read. But often, while seeing it that way, we take Views count and Blog stats too seriously.
    We start forgetting the real reason we write.
    A necessary reminder.

    Liked by 1 person

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